Public Buses in Santiago -.las micros

If you live in a city, you most likely have taken a bus. When I was in Chicago, I took the bus to work, to school, to meet up with friends. Never did take it past a certain time, rush hour. But the most important thing is that when I took a bus one way, I knew I could take that bus on the return trip.

Scenario #1- Don`t remember the destination**, but I remember the journey.
First class with a new client! I had 2 options: out of the way trip by taking the metro or arrive at the front door by taking 2 buses. Guess which one I did? Fearful of the confusing bus system, I put on my bravery pants and headed to the bus stop. I jumped on Bus #1 and searched like a lost gringa for paradero #1. Found the paradero! Got off, and waited for Bus #2. Office buildings started to disappear and my projected arrival time had passed. 20 minutes on the bus and I felt like I was heading the wrong way.  I asked some nice-looking lady about my destination. She pointed across the street, at traffic going in the OPPOSITE direction. Dammit. I was heading east and not west, or west and not east. My mind and body still have not oriented to the North Star here.
So, I jumped off and my bus was there, in that moment! Good luck, right? HA. Got off that bus after I asked someone on the bus about my street. They said, you are far away. Here I am,  in a place called Vitacura. Or, fancy-pants residential neighborhood. A cute, very talkative señora tried to help me. She wanted to know my life story, but I should be teaching English RIGHT NOW. The first class with my client. And I am incredibly lost ,after taking 3 buses.
Solution? Jumped in a cab during rush hour. Brilliant.

Bus Scenario #2 Heading Home from La Dehesa (Hollywood Hills of Santiago)
A little intro: I teach Mom & Pop at their office and their 4 daughters at their home. But, they live FAR from the metro. So, the only option is ...you guessed it. I planned my trip there with transsantiago.cl. Probably the worst public transportation website in the world.

Class #1. I arrived to the house! With no bus problems! Thanks to a super nice guy who is the bartender at a sushi restaurant. Thats a whole `nother post coming  your way... I took the 426 and the C09 to arrive. I got on the C09 to head home and asked the driver where to switch to the 426. He says, "Where are you headed? You can`t take the 426 to the metro from here." He suggested a different bus back to the metro. Awesome. Just to be sure, I asked a lady sitting in front of me. You can never be too sure. So, I switched to Bus #2 that would hopefully take me to the metro. After a few minutes, a gringo-esque guy tells me that this bus does not go to the metro. WHAT. That is what I was told. Twice. Okay. So I get off. The list of bus numbers at this paradero might as well be Mandarin. So I wait.

And I am done asking people how to get home. I will just pick a bus and hopefully sleep in my bed tonight. Buses do have a list of street names in the window, so I looked for Providencia. Found it! And, 10 minutes later I realize I am on a local bus. It is going SO SLOW down a side street, and I see the highway that I should be on. Shit. This is the longest freaking commute ever. Is this bus really going to take me to the metro? Wait a second... what do I see outside the bus? Parque Arauco. I am nowhere near my house. Now, I am just mad and tired. I need a beer, a bottle of wine and a shot of whiskey. That is what the buses will do to you. Consider yourself warned!
Solution: Pablo lives on the other side of the mall. If you were not aware, I lived with him for 2 weeks before I found my house. For the first time, I knew where I was. And it wasn`t where I wanted to be.

Sorry that story is so long. But, it is important that you know how messed up the bus system is here in Chile. My problems with the bus system include, but are not limited to:

• You must pay with the BIP. Also, if you do not have sufficient money on your BIP, you cannot recharge your card on the bus. No money transactions happen on the bus. Unless you buy ice cream from a vendor...
• The bus you take one way does not always bring you back. In fact, I doubt you can take the same buse round-trip if you want to follow the same route.
• Timing between buses is not coordinated or predictable. I have arrived at my bus station to go to La Dehesa at 4:30 and waited 5 minutes or 20 minutes. At my switch for bus #2, I have waited long enough to think about getting a cab for the last leg of the trip.
• There are people in yellow jackets at the bus. They are paid to be there (I think) but they do not do anything. They stand near the door when more than 4 people get onto the bus. If you ask them which bus you should take, I do not trust their answers. However, once I was saved by Mr. Yellowjacket. Of course I should have been at the bus station across the street. He realized I was on the wrong side of the road when I kept asking to go to a street that was in the completly opposite direction of traffic. HAHA.
• Depend only on yourself if you take the bus. Do not expect strangers to be able to point you in the right direction or give you alternative solutions.
• It is safe to take the buses after dark. Can`t do that in the States. 1 point for Chile.

Just so you know, after 3 trips to the house far away from the metro, I still have not had a "perfect" trip.

Moral of the story? Take a cab.  


*in the middle of writing this, I remembered where I was going. Ford Chile. Yup, the one and only US, Michigan-born company is 1 of the offices where I teach English. And, my client, Jacky, was super nice and forgiving about my extra tardiness.