70 and Snowboarding

I'm silly. I jump and hop around like a kid on Christmas morning when my friends and I pulled up to Keystone for the first day of snowboarding this season. The sun was shining, there were skis leaning against cars and people enjoying a Coors before hitting the slopes. After I put on my new boots and had my board out - I just smiled. God has blessed me. He has been leading me along on a journey far from one I was imagining throughout college. But here I am in Denver, Colorado. I wanted to be here for college, didn't happen. It was #1 on my preferences for cities with Teach for America. I was in Phoenix for two years. Now - here I am. And I'll be snowboarding until I am 70.
The mountains are luminous as you drive west on the 70 and they just keep multiplying. The best part is as you hug the mountainside, around a bend is another set of large, snow-capped peaks. I always look out for the mountain goats and am hoping to see a mountain lion at least once.
The snow was there and 10% of the mountain was open for us early-bird skiers and boarders.

From Denver Fall09

Did I mention it was 70 degrees in Denver the day before heading to the mountains to snowboard? Love it.

Here is how the ski vacations of the past have panned out for me...
Day 1 - stare wildly at the mountains and comment every 5 minutes on how amazingly beautiful it is and that I want to live here.
Days of snowboarding - wake up early for breakfast and coffee. Be on the slopes for the first run of the day and hit the fresh pow-pow before another board slices through. Sometimes, I'll pause at the top of a run to take a big, deep breath and a photo. I'll take a quick 15 minute break to eat and have a Gatorade. Back out to the slopes for Round 2.
Oh, you know where I am going with this one. The last run of the day. Let me tell you. My thighs are shaking, maybe even burning a little bit. I'm not sure I can make it. Then, I just look around me and feel that open air liberty that rushes around as you fly down the slopes. I've already hit a few jumps on the sides, fallen when I try to get more air than the last time and I've even gone through some moguls. Those moguls take a lot of concentration. They are a blast!
All that goes through my mind as I take my time - and allow the adrenaline to race through my legs -
At the bottom of the hill, I can't wait to be back at the top again tomorrow.

From Denver Fall09

Now - I can do that each weekend. What!? You mean I don't have to be so sore that I can't get out of bed the next morning as early as the first day? I can take a long break to enjoy a beer at the summit! Now - I get to drive 90 minutes to be at the parking lot of Keystone or Breck. Sometimes, we'll venture out to Vail.

I'll venture.

From Denver Fall09

It's another venture on the open road, and this season, the road is white, powdery and fills me with adrenaline and sheer joy!

Social Protest Dump

Here we go.
Our school leader resigned his job one week ago. He left. He started the middle school here in Denver and opened the new high school this year. I moved from Phoenix (thankfully) to Denver to be part of the founding team and family. Our students came from our middle school and various other charter and public middle schools. Most of them bought into his leadership, style and passion for their education. Some of our families have been with him for 5-8 years. I've known him for less than one year. This kids put their whole lives into him. He was their Pied Piper.
He left without an explanation or goodbye. To kids - this is an awful abandonment. This act made them go into wild cycles of emotions, from anger and resentment to disappointment and a drop in self-esteem. These are kids that already have been through hell and back, or still living in hell. This man brought sunshine to their cloudy dismal lives. He brought them hope. And gone.
Teachers? We are here but very minuscule compared to his grandness. So he left and the teachers took all the heat. I have seen kids plummet in a few days because of the abandonment and diminished sense of security. It is an awful place to be.
As adults, we were abandoned by the man that led us here to Denver. 5 out of the 7 of us teachers came from out of state to help open this school!
I felt frustrated and disappointed and shocked. But I found my strengths and I found my leadership - and I provided consistency and structure. The two things kids need.
The kids, though, felt anger and were mad. Who can they direct that to? The people they see everyday and that are still here. Us. A few of them failed some quizzes, failed to complete their homework and sat in a daze.
A small group of the student leaders went Lord of the Flies and led the kids into rebellion.

We had a protest outside of our school doors yesterday. Posters. Chanting. The student government was represented - minus 4 of the kids that went to school that day. Yup. They skipped school and stayed outside all day. 30 degrees and cold. Marching. Denver police came to monitor. The kids called the news stations to get them out here. They didn't come because they called our office. At least the news reporters have some decency. A few of the parents were even out there marching with them. Marching to get Mr. Barrett back.
Lesson #1 - protests are about social injustice and a call for change. The injustice is that he didn't say goodbye. So protest outside his house.
Lesson #2 - not going to school is skipping = truancy = unexcused absence = unlawful. The choice to arrive at school and not go to school is the definition of defiance.
Lesson #3 - every action has a consequence. Some are good, some not so good.

So here I am, sitting in a classroom, with 25 students writing papers about social protests throughout history.
I was affected. You chose to skip my class. You chose to break that trust and relationship that we had. You chose to say - no, he is the only person and the only brick in the wall that can get me to college. Bullshit.
If you want to make an adult choice, you gotta deal with adult consequences.
All these kids that had a great relationship with me - bull.
They were saving their true self for one person. And it wasn't their own self.

What is sad about all this is that these kids are really smart. Really smart. But they just have been believing in the wrong person the whole time. They haven't started to believe that they are worth it. That THEY are the kids that make KIPP, KIPP.
I am sad that my relationships with my students is so adversely affected. I am saddened that they are not internally motivated for school and their future. I am disheartened by their own pain and suffering. Yet - they chose to internalize all those emotions instead of talking about it with us. They made a choice - and that chose ended up being the wrong one. They broke the relationships that were still there.
Where do we go from here?