Reflecting: Refueling in Chile

Everyone asks, "Why did you come to Chile?" "Por qué estas aqui?"

Great question. For the first few weeks, I just soaked up the dancing, drinking, meeting new people and exploring the city. Now the question wakes me up at 8AM, walks with me to my English classes and simmers as I cook dinner.

Ever wonder if you are operating at your best? Last year, I tried to explain my burnt-out self to friends and family by saying, "I feel like I've given all my energy, there is only a little bit left in my toes. Nothing is filling that back up." Sure, I have my faith, absolutely fantastic friends that I miss everyday, a great new CrossFit gym, an inspirational church and the Rockies have been my playground for 3 years.

Just like with teaching, I need to assess where my energy has been and where I want it to be. Then, get there through discipline, determination and using my support systems.

At the end of last year, here's where I was:

"Burned Out." A free website told me what I already knew. That 35% felt like 19%. 

This morning, sitting with my Nescafe on the patio?

So, in the spirit of my rejuvenation and refueling, I'd like to thank a few people that kept me afloat last year when I wanted to walk out. 

Note: my usual sarcasm is definitely paused as I genuinely want to shout-out how much you mean to me. When I see you all, you all will get bear hugs and lots of love from me :) 

@my parents: You define supportive and unconditional love. Me heading to Chile (again)? Not exactly what you dreamed and planned for when I was a wee-tot. But you trust me and are still loving me. Thank you!

@Laura - We became friends when we both were at our most-stressed and least-energetic times in life. Then, you recognized that I wasn't myself last year and handed me an opportunity to rejuvenate. This year would not have been possible without you! Can't wait to celebrate love and friendship in Arizona with you and Seba in June! 

@Emily - coffee, scones and nights out in LoDo scratch the surface. You are honest, thoughtful and genuine. The shock on your face when you learned that I don't have a 5 or 10 year plan even scared me into action (even though I can't brainstorm in straight lines). Can't ask for a better roommate turned lifelong friend! 

@Kathleen - You are the only friend that 100% pushed me to go to Chile. Then there's the Bloody Marys. Gourmet Food. Bachelor. Whiskey and Hot-tubs. You scare me the way you walk with knives in a kitchen but damn, we make good food! Can't wait to drink beer and dance in the mountains to celebrate your wedding! 

There are SO many other friends to appreciate and celebrate. @SarahL, @KatieA, @MeganC, @MeganL, @Allison, @Katherine, @Ashley, and @SkiHouse.


- Un abrazo grande desde Chile

MIchigan Adventures

Memorial Day weekend has its significance but this year was more powerful than any other year. My Grandpa Karnowski passed away this year and he was a humble, quiet man who was devoted to his family and his very close friends. He was still serving a major role in an organization until the day he died. He was a war vet - WWII Navy - and this year the Memorial Day festivities celebrated his service. There were 5 families that were honored at this year's Memorial Day service and 2 of them were family friends of my dad growing up. The fighter jets flew over our memorial just as my own Grandma was receiving a plaque honoring her soldier.

We also celebrated the wedding of our close family friend - a cousin without sharing DNA - you know who those people are - and it was 90 degrees at an outdoor wedding. It was GORGEOUS! Morgan and Pat were both radiant and looked so happy together. What a great wedding!

In one weekend, we celebrated with newlyweds and also celebrated the honor and service of my late grandpa.

Family is everything :)

We are Family. All my sisters and me!

Rough week last week for my family - the Karnowski side. Luckily, my sisters all showed such amazing support. I am so lucky to have developed such strong friendships throughout college. These girls have become lifelines and are truly reliable and dependable sisters. How am I so lucky to have such fabulous friends?

Do all people have such a strong network of women - or men- that they can rely on for anything, no matter where they are in the world? How is it that we find the right people to fit into our own lives, and that we fit into their world? I am just fascinated by the physiological connections we make that transcend time and place.

I sometimes wonder why certain people stick in my memory, even though their time was fleeting. And. What is it about an event or action that causes us to index it into a filing cabinet upstairs?

I seem to remember simple, seemingly mundane things about me and my sisters in college. Amanda and I would sit and drink coffee, eat grapefruit and watch those cheesy morning talk shows during the hot summer days of Chicago. That was right when I came back from South America and didn't want to be in the States. She let me just be myself, never judged me and accepted the new me. Still love her for being so supportive during that pivotal re-entry time.

This past week I could have easily felt so alone and out of place. I did for a few moments. But even though I was not sitting next to any one sister in particular, I could feel their love and support through their calls, emails and beautiful flowers. I found hope in the strength of my sisters.